Cayman Islands – The Romney-Gekko 2012 campaign (a satirical project of Americans United for Change) unveiled the third in its series of mock campaign ads (web video) called “Find Your Tax Haven. “ The ad, inspired by Corona’s “Find Your Beach” campaign, follows ABC News’ report last week that Mitt Romney is ‘Parking Millions in the Cayman Islands’ . The Wall Street Journal’s follow-up reporting found that the Romney campaign’s claims that this has no effect on the amount he pays in U.S. taxes “may be wrong or misleading” according tax experts who “said some of the offshore holdings are likely intended to help Mr. Romney avoid paying an obscure but hefty tax of as much as 35% on some of those investments, held in a tax-deferred retirement account.”
Corporate raider Gordon “Greed is good” Gekko rushed to the defense of his embattled running mate. “Paying your fair share in taxes is for wimps, not guys like Mitt and me” cackled Gekko via a Motorolo DynaTAC, coincidentally phoning in from an undisclosed Caribbean location. “So what if the malfunctioning corporation called the USA loses $100 billion in revenue each year with corporations and 1 percenters taking advantage of these offshore tax havens? Sure that leaves the average American stiff paying over $400 more, but it’s a zero sum game, sport. Somebody wins and somebody loses.”
As of press time, Gekko was still “laying low” in the Cayman Islands, riding out the bad publicity from the failed hostile takeover of Bluestar Airlines and his thwarted plot to dissolve the company, liquidate its assets, fire all the workers and raid the union’s pension fund. On that matter Gekko would only say: “You don’t win ‘em all, you keep on fighting, and if you need a friend, get a dog, it’s trench warfare out there.They can’t all be like GS Industries,” referring to the steel company his running mate Romney took over that ultimately went bankrupt, costing over 700 workers losing their jobs, health insurance and a part of their pensions, but not before Bain Capital partners paid themselves tens of millions of dollars in dividends.
“Now THAT’s how you ‘liberate’ a company, sport,” Gekko added. “And tell Mitt, if he needs to get away from the bad headlines for a few days, I’ll send the jet to pick him up. I’ve never seen a painting that captures the beauty of the ocean at this moment.”
Source: Romney-Gekko website – Check it out!