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10 Reasons to Vote for Donald Trump

1. More US jobs.

This no. 1 fact is actually a two-step process with the second step employing hundreds of thousands more than the first step — the US-Mexico border/relationship.

To build this enormous wall nearly 2,000 miles along the border of the US and Mexico, it will take tens of thousands of workers, electricians (after all, it will be electrified), engineers and security. Imagine this impenetrable fortress as the modern version of the Wall from Game of Thrones. The Wall will be made of skyscraper-grade steel, razor wire, massive concrete foundations which will be dug and poured a minimum of 20 feet down, and, lastly entirely electrified with such a high voltage that even insects up to 10 feet away will be zapped.

Once the Wall is fully functional, it will take a large staff to manage it. The full job potential, however, will now present itself as the US will need to increase their military strength due to the pending war between the US and Mexico. At this point, chances are excellent that this will start WWIII.

Imagine all the jobs the US will need at this point.

2. National Debt. Start over.

As most people know, Donald Trump is highly experienced with filing bankruptcy. As he has benefited several times from filing BK, each time starting over only to become billions of dollars rich, President Trump will bankruptcy out the US debt from China, as well as any and all foreign debts plus the debt to the Federal Reserve. Sometimes it is best to just… start… over. Vote for Trump so the US can start over.

3. White House decor.

In support of the equality of the sexes, Donald Trump has an agreement with ex-wife Ivanka Trump come in and entirely redecorate the White House. Additionally, Ivanka will tour the country speaking on how women can screw their husband in a divorce and walk away with millions. These items will surely win the women’s votes.

4. Bring on Global Warming.

Donald Trump firmly believes that global warming is a hoax. Recently, he stated, "It’s freezing and snowing in New York. We need global warming!" As this past winter is considered to have been one of the hardest winters in decades with insane amounts of snow, it just proves that there is no global warming. In fact, Trump believes we need global warming in order to keep these horrible winters from ever occurring again. In order to do so, Trump will revoke the EPA and let any industry do what they need to do in order to gain more profit. Any business that adds to the global warming affect will receive both tax breaks and government subsidies. A vote for Trump is a vote to stop winter!

5. Bring Reality TV to the White House.

Everyone wants to know what goes on behind the closed doors in the White House. President Trump will make sure this happens by introducing a new reality series called, "The Real White House" as well as "The Apprentice Goes to the White House."

6. Prove Obama is from Kenya.

Once Trump has full access to the White House and all the little secrets hidden within, he will come forth with the ultimate proof that Obama is a Muslim from Kenya. Once proven, President Trump will have all records of Obama stricken from the White House in addition to sending Obama back to Kenya.

7. Continue Trump’s great relationship with blacks.

As Trump has stated clearly, he has great relationships with blacks. In order to support the black community, Trump will make sure all White House janitors, gardeners, housekeeping, and any other service-oriented position in the White House hires at blacks to fill at least 50% of these service positions.

8. Save both the poor and middle class.

Trump considers himself a savior of the poor. Trump understands that the growing numbers of poor and drop in average household income is due to a multitude of jobs going overseas, President Trump will provide a tax break to any US citizen who relocates to another country to work for a US-owned company. This tax break will be the equal to the cost of the ticket to move overseas.

This plan will both provide jobs for the lower and middle class as well as reduce their numbers within the US.

9. Put a hold on any immigration.

Everyone knows that the US is full and cannot hold any new immigrants. Trump will cease allowing anyone to immigrate to the US whether for work or for education. Tourists will be allowed but only for a maximum time of 30 days. Anyone trying to stay longer will be immediately deported and billed for the cost incurred to deport them.

10. Develop the land being wasted in our National Parks.

There are millions of acres of prime real estate being wasted in our National Parks. Very simply, all National Parks will be sold to the highest bidder and develop as the buyer sees fit. The larger the profit the buyer makes from said development will earn a larger tax break.


References:

The Atlantic: What Exactly Is Donald Trump’s Deal?
Rolling Stone: 8 of the Sleaziest Things Donald Trump Has Said
The Daily Beast: The Dumbest Stuff Donald Trump Has Ever Said
NPR: 5 Things You Should Know About Donald Trump

 

Disclaimer:

All suggestions and references are purely fictional and satirical. Any coincidence is Trump’s fault for being an idiot.

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30 replies »

    • Kayla Delgadildo, stop with the whiny little name calling libs love to resort to when they realize their ideas are totally devoid of merit. Come strong with reasons, or STFU. Who made you the omniscient one who deems people winners or losers? Be advised, every stupid name you call capitalist, conservative, Republicans more closely describes you, times ten. Think about it, and BTW, learn how to spell (i.e. loser, not looser).

  1. Kayla, you wouldn’t want to vote for Trump if you’re a wantonly ignorant, bigot, wusy liberal OK with sucking the government teat. Why is it wrong for America to have borders? Every other country does and will shoot anyone they catch entering illegally. Keep barking at the moon until a Muslim terrorist slits your throat. Clinton’s evidently OK with her dopey Russian-roullete style immigration policy. Nobody, but nobody, can whine like a Democrat. Victims all. Spenders of other people’s money. Buck up and stop trying to impose your half-baked feel-good ideas on the American middle class.

    • Well, you obviously do not think for yourself. You have said nearly the exact same hateful vitriol that most Democrat-hater-Republicans say. Nearly word-for-word. I’m still waiting for solid proof on any of their claims.

      You are a million times more likely to have your throat slit when filling up for gas by a US citizen than you are by a Muslim terrorist. Think about it… I realize that can be difficult to do on one’s own, but I have faith…. Just how many times has any Muslim entered anywhere into your life, the life of your family members, friends, friends of friends, etc. and spewed forth hate-language about killing Americans? I feel 1000% safe on US soil from any overseas terrorists. However, I do not feel safe when walking around certain areas of the city where gang-banging occurs.

      Fear and hate are two very powerful things and Trump knows exactly what to do with them in order to gain power. Thankfully there are more people than not, and many more opening their eyes that this man is nothing more than a con-artist.

      Oh, btw… Islam is actually one of the more peaceful religions in modern times. ISIS is NOT Islam. Their followers are not Muslims. This really isn’t a difficult thing to understand yet everyone refuses to accept this. Fear of the unknown has caused more pain and death than any other reason in the world, and it is almost always combined with religion.

    • wow, someone had a big bowl of talking points AND a yuuuge glass of ‘the Kool-Aid’ this morning huh? Jesus, my brain hurts just reading that drivel Pat … go ahead, think for yourself sometime man … it’s what all the cool kids are doing. and p.s. : work on that spelling and grammar stuff Pat, it’ll make your bullshit easier to read.

  2. I agree with every change proposed by Trump EXCEPT for the selling of our National Parks to the highest bidder: Letting them develop the land as they see fit. I’m a conservationist; voted for Obama because he reinstated the 1960 “Land and Water Conservation Fund” to protect our National Parks. I am remorseful for that Vote. He didn’t put the money back into the parks but purchased more land instead of repairing and maintaining the National Parks we already have.
    I am now an Independent voting for Trump.

    • Trump doesn’t care one whit about us. All he has known and done is step on people in order to get where he is now. Has bailed on paying contractors, illegally used undocumented workers from Poland so he could pay them less and under the table. Filed BK three times in order to get out of paying those debts (he wasn’t in that bad of shape – he had come to realize whatever that specific investment was wasn’t going to make him the amount of profit in wanted). If you notice, since the BK laws have become more strict in order to keep people like Trump from using the system like that, Trump hasn’t files any BK’s. Okay, moving on…

      Trump University. That is a scam and a half. Targeted the desperate, financially-challenged individual promising them that they, too, can be as successful as Trump after attending his University. Learn all his secrets, etc. BULLSH*T!! The curriculum was naught. And “students” would find out that after they paid tuition, bought their books, that there were even further costs to a course. “Want to be as rich as Trump? Oh, then you need the “bonus” materials, curriculum, etc. That will cost you $x,xxx more.” If you have noticed, there has not been one single person who attended Trump U who has come out and praised the school and how it took them from rags to riches. Not one person. He’s been buying people off left and right through this entire campaign usually via gift donations to their charity of choice – that’s not going to happen for anyone that went to Trump U. He screwed people out of the last bit of money many had and laughed all the way to the bank.

      I could go on and on and on and on. Does Hillary have a list like this? lol — or any politician for that matter. Bush, Romney, Cruz, Bernie, Booker, etc. Not a one of them can hold a candle to all the bullshit that Trump has done to other people.

      You really want someone like this in charge of the US? He’s praising Putin, for gawd’s sake. He has financial agreements with so many countries and government that would be a major conflict of interests, which is why he will not release his taxes — even those that are out of audit and closed such as 2007.

      And he is a flat out liar. Blatantly lies and when he’s called on it, he still will argue. Trump to George Stephanopoulos, “Putin will not go into the Ukraine. Believe me, I know for a fact he will not go into the Ukraine.” George replies that Putin has already done so. Been in the Ukraine for a while now. What’s Trump say? “Oh, I didn’t mean in that way.” He mumbles something off about Obama, trying to put blame on him in some twisted way that only the mentally ill can see.

      And you still think he should be president? He is doing this because it is nothing more than the ultimate notch on his belt. To be the Top Dog in the US. He’s already asked Pence if Pence would oversee all the foreign affairs if they win. The foreign affairs have always been overseen by the president. Trump is already trying to pawn off work on others and he hasn’t even won.

      I’m still waiting for someone to provide me with a list like that from Hillary and there is none to be found.

      Please, think very very carefully before you vote. This is a decision that will heavily impact not just us, but the world.

      The only saving grace is I think that Congress would do all they could to impeach him as soon as possible. If they can impeach a president for having an affair, then impeaching Trump due to his long list of illegal activities shouldn’t be a problem at all. They have all they need with just Trump University alone. It would be the biggest bi-partisan decision ever seen in Congress.

      I beg you, please rething your decision very very carefully. His bullying behavior alone really should be enough as that will not work as President of any country. Look what just happened to a meeting with Obama and Duterte, Philippine’s president…. after Dutere insulted Obama, Obama canceled a meeting they were to have. And I agree with canceling the meeting 1000%. You must have a minimum level of decorum when running a country. Duterte pulled a Trump move and got called on it.

      Once again, think carefully before you vote. And this time, I am going to stop adding more. Kinda hard to stop when there is so much ill on Trump.

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